First a little background, my daughter Kaitlyn has the opportunity to go to Washington DC with her 6th grade class. Until recently she thought she wasn't going to be able to go. There were some requirements that she had been unable to meet and we hadn't known anything about them. During Christmas break from school she came to live with us and after a conference at her school David and I learned more about the trip and I emailed the teacher later to ask about it. The kids who had "chosen" not to go to DC were going to Animal Kingdom at Disney World. Since we hadn't known anything about any of it, I wanted to find out how much it was going to cost and what the requirements were and all that stuff. The teacher told me that since Kaitlyn's circumstances had changed that she might be able to make it so she could go on the DC trip. Well, Kaitlyn had been insisting that she didn't want to go, but I thought it might be a brave face because she thought she couldn't, so I asked about that. I told the teacher that if Kaitlyn really wanted to go that I would make sure it happened. There were fund raising requirements and, in total, the trip was going to cost about $525. She had about $70 from the fund raising she had been able to do, so that was a pretty big commitment.
It turned out that Kaitlyn did want to go, so I got to it. I accepted the M&M's that she hadn't been able to sell before and brought those to work. I am a henna artist and there was a local IndiaFest and I pledged my earnings to her trip. I also do face painting and glitter tattoos. I have a birthday party gig coming up and I've pledged the money from that as well. My parents are helping and Kaitlyn's mom's parents have said they'll help some, and between all that we're pretty close to meeting the goal. We have one more fundraiser at her school at the end of March as well. I've done henna there every year for a few years as it is, but now I actually have a daughter there so it's going to be even more gratifying.
Anyway, turns out Kaitlyn's "teenager-ness" has been showing at school and her trip is in jeopardy. I'm frustrated to say the least. How can she be doing this when I've been working so hard for something I thought she wanted to do. I guess I'll have to wait and see.
And, all of that doesn't even include the challenges that occur almost daily with Lyric. I love them both, A LOT, but I thank God for my parents who have them spend the night every Tuesday when they're in town. A little distance makes a big difference in how easy it is to have patience. As the step mom there is only so much I can do.
1 comment:
It IS the hardest thing you will ever do!!! I raised my two step sons, and man...it was TOUGH! When my then husband and I got married we had 4 boys under the age of 6, all living with us. (two of his, two of mine) Their mother was largely uninvolved, and so I stepped up to the plate. A couple years later we had a daughter together. I remember when we celebrated our first anniversary, I felt more like celebrating having survived my first year of step-parenthood!
I made lots of mistakes, and for several years as they were teenagers, felt sure I had ruined them. Then their dad and I divorced. Now, looking back, I know I did ok. They're adults now, and when the come to town they stay with my new husband and me. We've been able to have lots of heart to heart, adult to adult discussions, and I've been able to be clear with them and ask their forgiveness for some of the mistakes that bothered me most. Do your best to keep the lines of communication open with his girls, but let HIM be the disciplinarian with them. If you don't, it will come back to bite you in the butt later on!!! Hang in there, I bet you're a great step-mom!
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