What I need from a gym (so I'll actually go!)

So, what I've found out is that even when you're "finally" ready to work out, you still need the right gym.

At the beginning of 2005, I realized that I needed to get healthy and lose some weight. I was up to 273, had high cholesterol, and I had my PCOS (Poly Cystic Ovarian Syndrome) under control. My dad's mom, who I've been told I resemble, had died at 41 from a heart attack when my dad was 17. I certainly didn't want to do that to my kids, so I joined Curves and started WeightWatchers. I did really well and was able to stay focused and even attempted a few 5Ks (okay, maybe 2). I lost 55 lbs and felt better than I had in a very long time.

Then I met my husband, wanted to be with him instead of exercising, started eating junk again, got married, found out I have a very underactive thyroid and gained all but 5 lbs back.

Fast forward to feeling huge and loss of self confidence and New Years 2008 – I resolved to get back on track. That was easier said than done. My husband doesn't have to worry about his weight (although that's mostly because he will go all day and forget to eat – how do you FORGET to eat - and he obviously has held on to his metabolism as he's gotten older. In January a very big and inexpensive gym open very near my house. My parent's got Kayla and me gift certificates to join. Kayla is my biggest supporter at home – always questioning my food choices. Anyway, David, Tiffany, Kayla and I joined this very big gym. Tiffany never did go, not even once, Kayla went once with me, I managed 4 times I think and David has gone a few. What I ultimately realized was that I was not comfortable working out with men around (except David) and it was too impersonal for me.

When I was losing weight and going to Curves I ended up working there. I worked there for almost 2 years and loved it. I love encouraging the women there and became very attached to them. It was my second job and I eventually had to give it up, but it was great fun while it lasted – knowing everyone's name and their stories and helping them reach their goals. I think that kind of feeling – like someone is glad you're there and you're making the effort – that was one of the feelings I was looking for. I've found I'm much more willing to let myself down than I am someone I feel accountable to – that's going to notice when I'm not there.

So, since I wasn't going to the big impersonal gym and my old Curves is too far away, I decided to try another gym. At work they have a corporate discount page on their website. Lo and behold, there was an advertisement for a gym I hadn't heard of. The website looked great, I sent an email for someone to contact me, and ended up going last Friday night to learn how to do the machines and generally about the gym. That part was ok, I still had some reservations – the girl I spoke with was pretty upfront about it not going to be as social as Curves – and that's another thing I wanted, but I was willing to give it a try. I was concerned that the whole time I was there only one other person came in. But I'm ready to do something, so I thought here goes. I went the next morning after Lyric & Kaitlyn went to their Grandma's house (their mom's mom), and the girl working at the gym was there by herself, no member's were working out and she paid attention when I first came in the door and when I asked her to put some "more upbeat" music on (Roy Orbison was playing), but she never once even looked at me again that I saw and the games she was playing on the computer at the front desk were louder than the music that was playing for me to work out to. I tried it, I really did, but I just got so angry – I just walked out without saying a word. My mother taught me that if you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all. She probably didn't notice anyway. I just felt like, since she knew it was my first time, she should have been paying attention to whether I was using the machines correctly – or asking if I had any questions. I was having a little trouble. I know I should have asked – but the point was that nothing was showing me that this was the gym for me. Back to the drawing board!